After thinking I knew my way to the lunch room, turning down an unknown hallway, getting lost and then having to ask someone for directions to the cafeteria, I finally arrived at my destination. It was so much different than the lunchroom in Powell. All of the tables were small and circular, and every clique was sizably smaller than what I was used to. The thought about where to sit was daunting. I looked around and I could hardly pick out more than twenty faces, and I couldn’t imagine going up to any of them and asking them to sit with them.
Begrudgingly, I scooted my way up to the lunch line to purchase world famous Bosco sticks. I cringed as I stood in the lunch line. All around me, kids were talking about topics I may or may not have been interested in. My heart felt a pang of nostalgia as I saw a group of boys laughing and talking animatedly. They were the picture perfect replica of Dalia, Riya, Lacey and I just a few short weeks ago.
Despite what anyone has ever said, when you live miles away from your friends, your relationship can never be the same. Emailing, phone calls, and letters don’t replace the true wonders of spending actual time in space with your friends. As I waited for the group of boys to finish paying, I glanced around the lunch room. I wondered if I would ever be able to fit into one of the cliques here as well as I had in Ohio. My eyes kept searching and searching, but no matter how far they swept, I didn’t see one person who I could imagine myself getting close to. Sighing, I picked up two Bosco sticks and a bottle of water and gave the lunch lady a five dollar bill.
As I waited for her to fish through the change compartment and retrieve my designated amount of change to give me, I had one of those empowering thoughts. The kind where, in your head, you tell yourself that you only have one life; one choice, one opportunity at this life. You tell yourself, I’m going to make a difference in this place. I’m from Powell, Ohio, and I’ve been through experiences that these people could benefit from. I have view points and morals that could help educate these people. Where I’m from, the student body is diverse. Here, I have only come across one African American. I have to make a friend so that I can show them what Ohioans are like.
My thoughts were interrupted by the lunch lady sticking her gloved hand right out in front of my face and jingling the change in the palm of her hand.
“Here you are, dear,” she said.
“Oh,” I said. “Thanks.”
She smiled at me, and I walked away from the lunch line, looking around for potential friends. I started for the first table I saw. I didn’t notice the crowd I was about to join arms with at first, but after I saw myself face to face with several boys laughing obnoxiously with their shoulders hunched and their heads face down, I back-traced. There was no way I would be able to spend an entire half an hour listening to boys talk about nothing but facts and insults which would have a strong school-base to them. Not to mention the fact that I would feel dumb for not knowing any of the underlying facts. I didn’t know these particular boys, but I did know their type. Somethings never change no matter where you go, and school cliques are one of those things.
“Jeanah,” I heard someone call. I turned my head and saw Rob, the nice boy who walked me to history class. “Do you want to sit with us?” He motioned towards a table with two other boys, and three girls at it.
“Yeah,” I said smiling. “Thank-you.”
“No problem,” he said, smiling amiably back at me.
I sat down in the seat across from Rob, next to one of the girls. When I set my tray down, everyone was staring at me, but not in an obtrusive way. The girl I was sitting next to had this smile on her face that seemed truly genuine. It didn’t seem like she had a reason to smile. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone in my life who smiles as much as she did.
“Everyone, this is Jeanah. Jeanah, this is everyone.” Rob laughed at his fake introduction. “No, I’m just messin’ with yah. That’s Riley,” he said pointing to the smiliest girl I have ever met. She had brown curly hair and braces on her teeth. “Next to her is Ellie, then Jessie. They’re twins,” he added unnecessarily. They both gave identical shy smiles accompanied by little identical waves. They both had light blond hair, blue eyes, and wild freckles all over their face. I smiled back at them, thinking that they were probably the type of twins who were inseparable. I knew if I had a twin, or even a sibling, I would not be eating lunch with them at school. But, they were adorable, so I’m glad they did. “That is Ryan,” he said, motioning towards a bulky boy with a shaved head and strong muscular arms.
“Sup?” Ryan said in this impossibly low baritone voice that made my throat hurt just thinking about how deep it was. I laughed at him and managed a curt,
“Not much.”
“And finally,” Rob finished. “That’s Justin.” Justin looked equally as shy as the twins did, but he had this quality about him that made me think that inside, he was just as loud as the rest of us.
I was surprised at how blatantly nice they all were to me. There was that small town charm radiating out of these crazy people again. Right when I sat down, I was included in their conversation as easy as it was for me to pull my purple sweatshirt on that morning.
“We thought we’d save you from a terrible fate,” Riley said sarcastically, glancing at the table of boys who I almost dined with. Even sarcastically, Riley had this gorgeous smile.
“And I am eternally greatful,” I said.
“Yeah. They’re nice boys, don’t get me wrong,” one of the twins said. I didn’t keep track of who was who, and quite frankly I didn’t think it mattered. “It’s just… you want to get into a better crowd, Jeanah.” I loved the way she said my name at the end. It tied the sentence together, and made it feel that much more personal.
We took short eating intermittence breaks in between our conversation, but when the conversation was going, I learned so much. So far, I learned that Ryan played Football; one of the twins, Ellie, I thought, did ballet while the other one, Jessie, took tap; Rob always had straight A’s; Justin had no life outside of video games and finally, Riley had been to forty six out of the fifty states in the USA. The exceptions being Alaska, Hawaii, Maine and Rhode Island. But most importantly, I learned that even nice people can fall into the majority trap.
“So wait,” Ryan said in his reverberatingly loud tenor voice. “I just don’t understand how you,” he spat, “could have gotten expelled. Not that you’re not cool enough to be, it’s just you’re not rebellious enough.” Everyone else around the table joined in on our conversation.
“You would be surprised at how rebellious I am,” I said sarcastically but with a tone that suggested I was being totally serious.
“No,” Rob said skeptically. “What’d you do? You gotta tell us.”
“Let’s just say,” I said with a big toothy grin. “It was totally unexpected.” The people at my table gasped.
“I can’t believe it was so bad that you had to move over two thousand miles away!”
I smiled to myself. There was nothing wrong with making yourself seem a little more interesting to those who don’t know you. After all, seldom do you ever get chances to be whoever you want to be in a new place.
After the bell rang, I stood up, said goodbye to my new lunch buddies who openly invited me to sit with them every day now. Before leaving the tiny lunch room, I looked back at the table where I almost sat, and I saw him. My neighbor. Blending in with the boys I almost befriended.*
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